As a kind, compassionate, GRIEVING parent who made a tough end-of-life choice to terminate a wanted pregnancy (TFMR = termination for medical reasons) what you need is non-judgemental grief support.
Wouldn’t it be nice if you could tap into the grief resources specific to the unique tough feelings of terminating a wanted pregnancy?
Because you already know that:
There is a huge lack of TFMR-specific (or at the very least TFMR-friendly) resources and tools. You’ve looked and joined “baby loss communities” or groups, but the intricacies of TFMR is just not understood (or you are even judged harshly and outright for speaking up about your experience).
You don't deserve judgement, misunderstanding, or “I could never” statements thrown at you.
You deserve to safely learn to move with your grief, without needing to defend your heart-based medical decision to reduce suffering or a painful, prolonged death (yours and/or your baby’s), no matter the diagnosis and reason.
You don't deserve judgement, misunderstanding, or “I could never” statements thrown at you.
You deserve to safely learn to move with your grief, without needing to defend your heart-based medical decision to reduce suffering or a painful, prolonged death (yours and/or your baby’s), no matter the diagnosis and reason.
“People going through loss don’t need easy answers; they need safe places to help them navigate everything they are going through."
-Jennifer Dukes Lee
Imagine if you could tap into resources for parents like you who have been through THIS specific type of pregnancy loss:
- You would feel relieved to know that you have access to a place where you can bring your fears and pain and talk about the big hard, even very complicated and "taboo", feelings after terminating a wanted pregnancy
- You will feel understood on topics like the guilt of the decision, the stigma of having to go out-of-state to get care, and the heartbreak of seeing off-hand comments and posts about the evils of ‘abortion’
- You will feel safe from subtle or potential judgement
- You will feel cared for when you are at your most fragile, your most permeable, your most exhausted (because grief is EXHAUSTING)
- You will feel supported by the grief tools/prompts/videos tailored to the unique and often complicated feelings of terminating a wanted pregnancy. You'll save time searching for materials that work "just enough" but aren't quite right for this experience
A place where you don’t have to explain yourself and your loving, heartbreaking choice...
A place with tools specific to this type of pregnancy loss, to help you process and cut through the trauma and stigma that surrounds TFMR
That’s exactly why I've created this resource:
The TFMR Support Sanctuary
The only online grief toolkit and safe community space for bereaved TFMR parents (parents who have lost a baby due to a Termination For Medical Reasons) who are looking to process the tough grief layers of this out-of-order and often stigmatized death, all while honoring and remembering their babies
Actionable tools for your grief toolkit so you can mourn well in a safe space for your grief and receive inspiration and hope from others who have been there
Whole course bundle for $297
Inside the TFMR Support Sanctuary, you’ll receive access to:
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A monthly LIVE grief support session, a drop-in support group, live on Zoom |
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The Sanctuary Forum, our private TFMR meeting space (a closed Facebook group) |
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Survive and Thrive after TFMR, a course to help you move with the grief of losing a baby in this heartbreaking way |
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Restore: Energy Healing for Grief Bundle, a gentle way to move into relaxation and allow your body and mind to work through trauma and hard emotions |
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Peace of Mind: Audio Mindfulness Program for TFMR baby loss |
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PLUS A BONUS:
Grief Support Video Library
Grief Support Video Library
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Access to all the courses and bundles is 100% virtual with a personal login so you can watch/download from any device
Want to see more? Take a short tour INSIDE the TFMR Support Sanctuary:
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TFMR and any baby loss is so lonely, isolating and stigmatized.
What you need is HOPE that you can come out on the other side.
What you need is HOPE that you can come out on the other side.
Yes! I want in:
Starting at $33/USD per month
How you'll experience healing and grief processing in the Sanctuary:
In the TFMR Support Sanctuary all the materials/courses/bundles are created around the
Healing through the 3Cs Process
The Healing Through the 3Cs Process (Community Care, Creative Expression, and Compassionate Self-Care) is a formula to help you:
- Break through shame and guilt through sharing your truth and giving and receiving true support
- Process and move with your grief using mindfulness, creativity, and story
- Honor your unique grieving and self-care style
Find support from other parents who have been there and get it. No stigma, no judgement, no matter how grey, no matter if your termination was for fetal or your own maternal/perinatal concerns
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Explore creative tools to process your grief (Some tools are "passive," some are "active." So you can receive healing or dive into the grief work, depending on YOUR energy level in that moment)
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Create your ever-evolving compassionate self-care in grief plan--because our needs change in grief, and continue to unfold as we do. You'll learn to be kind to yourself in your grief and hold space for your big emtions, even if those around you will not or cannot
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All of these three processes come together to help you move with grief and find healing:
Grieving in a society that doesn't understand:
You're in the right place if you are looking for an understanding, accepting, caring space and tools to work gently with your big grief.
And here’s the thing. We are a grief illiterate society (pretty much worldwide). What this means is the only thing we may have been (wrongly) taught growing up is that grief moves in 5 stages and then you are done with it (wrong)
You were “taught” (if we can even call it that) that it’s best to just push it down/move forward/get back to work (who does this actually work for?)
You were "taught" to just “move on,” which for many looks like repressing our true feeling and internalizing the capitalist way as the only way - you know, just get back to being a good ‘ole worker cog in the system and you'll "move past it."
I don’t know about you, but the "push-it-down" and "move on" approach did NOT work for me.
Just pushing it down probably doesn't work for you either, since you are here, looking for another way:
A heart-based, human way.
I felt this too, and kept following my intuition to do grief my own way. And I invite you to do grief YOUR way too!
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For me, this looked like grieving and healing in a cyclical, flowing, divine feminine way.
Healing through nature, through following rhythms, through journaling, art, ritual, energy work and sharing in community.
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"She was no longer wrestling with the grief, but could sit down with it as a lasting companion and make it a sharer in her thoughts.”
- George Eliot
- George Eliot
I've been where you are, and I know how hard it is:
Waking up in the morning, the grief hitting you all over again. You ask yourself, “How is this my reality?” The guilt, the decision, the traumatic process of the diagnosis and birth/procedure, the memories rush back to you. How? Why? What do you even do now to begin to understand this immense grief?
You open up Google or Reddit or Instagram again and dive into the baby loss community. Some of the posts resonate with you (and you DO belong in the wider pregnancy loss community) but some of the resources just aren’t quite right.
Maybe you’ve even shared part or all of your story in some of the comments or groups and got answers back from other people like, “Oh, but it was your choice soooo…” or “Well, I could never do that.” Judgement. Direct or subtle. No matter, it burns and stings just the same. Can’t they just see you as the bereaved parent you are?
You open up Google or Reddit or Instagram again and dive into the baby loss community. Some of the posts resonate with you (and you DO belong in the wider pregnancy loss community) but some of the resources just aren’t quite right.
Maybe you’ve even shared part or all of your story in some of the comments or groups and got answers back from other people like, “Oh, but it was your choice soooo…” or “Well, I could never do that.” Judgement. Direct or subtle. No matter, it burns and stings just the same. Can’t they just see you as the bereaved parent you are?
Wondering if this pregnancy loss support membership would be right for you and your TFMR situation?
The following people who have had to terminate for medical reasons, very very grey through fatal, are welcome in the TFMR Support Sanctuary:
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Note on partners and spouses:
Partners of any gender are welcome as well, although throughout all the course bundles there is a lot of talk and examples around the intimate, somatic experience of carrying the child in our wombs, the deaths that occurred in and through our bodies, and the implications for our minds, bodies and souls in the aftermath.
As a non-carrying partner, some of this information may not directly apply to your own body, but as a supporting spouse or partner you vicariously lived through it too in your own way. If you are open to these visceral conversations, this is the course for you too.
Partners of any gender are welcome as well, although throughout all the course bundles there is a lot of talk and examples around the intimate, somatic experience of carrying the child in our wombs, the deaths that occurred in and through our bodies, and the implications for our minds, bodies and souls in the aftermath.
As a non-carrying partner, some of this information may not directly apply to your own body, but as a supporting spouse or partner you vicariously lived through it too in your own way. If you are open to these visceral conversations, this is the course for you too.
Grief only exists where love first lived.
-Anonymous
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I would LOVE to have you join in the journey with me now. By becoming a member, you are helping me build these resources from the ground up. Your input and feedback will shape the direction of the Sanctuary, and your investment now will help me continue to create this space for grieving parents in the future. You are helping out our web of support and taking part in the founding of something really special that will positively impact so many TFMR families, just like yours. |
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Yes! This sounds like the support space for me:
What others are saying:
"Sabrina's sessions and work have really helped me in that she is so good at creating and holding space for all aspects of the TFMR experience.
From personal experience, it is often very difficult to do that for ourselves and I have found it so necessary to have that help in order to tackle some of my bigger hurdles in grief and processing my loss. I really appreciate that Sabrina does this work and helps us along our own path in healing."
From personal experience, it is often very difficult to do that for ourselves and I have found it so necessary to have that help in order to tackle some of my bigger hurdles in grief and processing my loss. I really appreciate that Sabrina does this work and helps us along our own path in healing."
-Meggi
"Sabrina has been a gentle and empathetic support to me.
She's a great listener who acknowledged my past pregnancy traumas and pregnancy after loss fears with kindness and compassion.
She helped me feel as though I wasn't alone.”
She's a great listener who acknowledged my past pregnancy traumas and pregnancy after loss fears with kindness and compassion.
She helped me feel as though I wasn't alone.”
- Amanda
Choose your pricing & support level
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RISE Choosing the RISE level gives you Monthly Membership to the Sanctuary. You receive: ✔Access to the TFMR Support Sanctuary and all future updates ✔ Membership to the TFMR Sanctuary Forum, a closed Facebook group for bereaved TFMR parents ONLY ✔ Future additions and updates, as long as you are a current member $33 USD
(Charges re-occur monthly) |
THRIVE The THRIVE level give you Lifetime Membership to the Sanctuary PLUS a 1 month Bereavement Care Package for a deeper, private experience that includes: ✔Access to the TFMR Support Sanctuary and all future updates ✔ Membership to the TFMR Sanctuary Forum, a closed Facebook group for bereaved TFMR parents ONLY ✔ Future additions and updates ✔ One Live Zoom Bereavement Session ✔ One Reiki/Spirit Baby Connections Session ✔ One Personalized grief support Tarot/Oracle reading ✔ 1 month of private chat/voice note bereavement doula support $555 USD
Application/invitation only 1 spot available in this monthly package |
TRANSFORM Want to REALLY dive in and get the full healing immersion experience? Your investment in the TRANSFORM level gives you Lifetime Membership to the Sanctuary PLUS Private Virtual Healing Retreat: ✔Access to the TFMR Support Sanctuary and all future updates ✔ Membership to the TFMR Sanctuary Forum, a secret Facebook group for bereaved TFMR parents ONLY ✔ Future additions and updates ✔Private Virtual Healing Retreat which includes a day of deep immersion and grief processing through:
✔ Live Zoom Bereavement Re-Story Restore Closing Ceremony You also will receive: ✔ 1 month of private chat/voice note bereavement doula support $997 USD
Only 2 spots available |
& if you are not satisfied with the level of support and materials in the TFMR Support Sanctuary, I offer a 30-day money back guarantee. (Refunds only available for the RISE, go-at-your-own-pace level) |
As your Pregnancy Loss Doula
I am here, by your side, as you go through the materials and get support in the community. You will NOT be alone (although you can work as privately as you want through the resources).
I want you to know that there is healing and companioning available for people going through medical terminations for health reasons. I created this virtual space, The TFMR Support Sanctuary, to soothe you in your pain and grief, so you know there is someone sitting beside you in the great abyss of this heartbreak.
I want you to know that there is healing and companioning available for people going through medical terminations for health reasons. I created this virtual space, The TFMR Support Sanctuary, to soothe you in your pain and grief, so you know there is someone sitting beside you in the great abyss of this heartbreak.
You'll find support in various ways within the Sanctuary:
Get your questions answered in the group, from other bereaved parents who know the same heartbreak. And as your Pregnancy Loss Doula/Facilitator of this membership, I am very active in the group and you can always tag me if you have a specific concern |
Throughout the materials and in different places in the portal, you will also be prompted to email me what you are working on. Take advantage of this support! I strive to answer emails within 24-48 hours during my work week |
If you want more personalized support, you can move up to the 1-on-1 THRIVE level and get access to a Bereavement Care Package (with live, private Zoom grief support sessions). I also have limited spots available for one-day intensive healing retreats as well. |
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More about your Pregnancy Loss DoulaHi, I'm Sabrina Fletcher, TFMR Bereavement Doula.
Ever since I went through my own termination in 2018, alone, my husband relegated to the waiting area, I've been drawn to help people going through the TFMR experience. One way I can help is by being your Pregnancy Loss Doula. Most people find me after they have gone through with their terminations.The postpartum period and beyond is when we still need much care and help. With or without a baby on this plane, we are still postpartum parents. It is still a rite of passage that deserves to be marked and celebrated and honored. We can continue bonds and honor our babies by being fully ourselves, messy grief and all. I believe that if we slow down when needed and feel into our grief as a process, we start to see our moods and feelings as sacred. Everyone’s grief and parenthood path is as unique as they are. As a loss doula, I combine my skills as a Reiki teacher, intuitive healer, tarot reader, contemplative educator and training as a baby loss family advisor into a holistic bundle of emotional and spiritual care. For you, the grieving parent. |
Who this membership is for
You are:
- Sick of finding yourself in the same grief layer and feeling like there is no way out
- Struggling with wanting to dive into grief work, but just don’t know where to start
- Worrying about how long this is going to last and feel so alone in the process
- You can’t stop dreaming about just being able to understand and be able to better handle your grief
- You can’t wait to find your non-judgemental TFMR community, to be held, to be seen, to be understood (without any long, drawn-out explanations)
This membership is NOT for you if...
The courses, bundles and safe forum space in the Sanctuary are NOT for you if you:
- Would rather just push your grief away and just completely ignore it
- Believe that certain terminations are okay (yours), and others are NOT ethical (others’). In this space, fatal through very very grey diagnoses are all seen as valid reasons to TFMR and judgement has a zero tolerance policy. This is a pro-choice space, and statistically 1 in 3 people in the community will have had an abortion for an unwanted pregnancy as well.
- Don’t have any time at all to devote to your grief process or healing (you’ll get the most out of the Sanctuary if you set aside just 30 minutes a week--although you can definitely do more--to either listen to a support video, do a meditation or some of the journaling prompts, or watch/receive Reiki in one of the healing videos)
- Are already set in the way you do your grief work and don’t want to add any new tools at all to your grief toolkit
“When a child dies, you bury the child in your heart.”
~ Korean Proverb
~ Korean Proverb
To sum it all up:
Joining the TFMR Support Sanctuary will give you what the title implies: a safe haven, a safe space after a termination pregnancy loss.
& the materials, courses and bundles in the Sanctuary will give you a guided way to explore all of the very complicated layers of the grief of the death of a baby through a termination.
& the materials, courses and bundles in the Sanctuary will give you a guided way to explore all of the very complicated layers of the grief of the death of a baby through a termination.
You’ll have access to the community space and various courses and bundles including:
Monthly LIVE group Grief Support Session (on Zoom)
($55/monthly value)
The Sanctuary Forum
($55/monthly value)
Survive and Thrive After TFMR Course
($97 value)
Restore: Energy Healing for Grief Bundle
($149 value)
Moving with Grief:
a Mindfulness Audio Program
($47 value)
Plus the BONUS: The Grief Support Library
($99 value)
Total value of over $447 and rising with each new release
All of the above for just $33/month
($55/monthly value)
The Sanctuary Forum
($55/monthly value)
Survive and Thrive After TFMR Course
($97 value)
Restore: Energy Healing for Grief Bundle
($149 value)
Moving with Grief:
a Mindfulness Audio Program
($47 value)
Plus the BONUS: The Grief Support Library
($99 value)
Total value of over $447 and rising with each new release
All of the above for just $33/month
The Sanctuary is a little corner of the internet where a bereavement doula specializing in this grief and other bereaved parents just like you have your back.
With audio tracks and videos you can listen to/watch during those sleepless nights...to help remind you of your innate goodness and the love in your parenting choice.
Tools to pull on on those hard days (and there are many in the grief of baby loss).
A supplement to therapy to help you feel even more resilient and capable of doing the hard work of grief.
A place to cultivate your journaling/art/creativity habit to accompany you in the tough moments.
A place of release, relaxation, even purging when necessary.
And most importantly, through being a member of the TFMR Support Sanctuary, you’ll feel:
Deeply cared for, in a loving, gentle space
Relieved to find a safe place to mourn and love your baby
Calmer and soothed by your best self-care practices
Understanding and revelations about your grief process
The warmth of a safe place that exists just for you, the bereaved TFMR parent
Deeply cared for, in a loving, gentle space
Relieved to find a safe place to mourn and love your baby
Calmer and soothed by your best self-care practices
Understanding and revelations about your grief process
The warmth of a safe place that exists just for you, the bereaved TFMR parent
FAQs
I’m not artistic at all. Will the art/creative part be too advanced for me?
I am not an artist by trade or education either! Many of the art prompts involve just lines or doodles, and you can even print out and collage your art if you don’t want to draw yourself (I have days when I don’t want to draw either). And there is always an option to do art using words if you prefer writing.
So even if you “can’t draw a straight line” (I can’t without a ruler!) I would encourage you to try and see what comes out. The tutorials are very much around the process, not a perfect artistic outcome, so if you are open to trying, I think you will enjoy it, even if you “don’t have an artistic bone in your body.”
So even if you “can’t draw a straight line” (I can’t without a ruler!) I would encourage you to try and see what comes out. The tutorials are very much around the process, not a perfect artistic outcome, so if you are open to trying, I think you will enjoy it, even if you “don’t have an artistic bone in your body.”
Is this Membership/course live?
Yes, there is one monthly, live Zoom meeting, a drop-in support group. The beginning and "practice" part of the call will be recorded, and towards the middle/end the recording will be turned off so we can all share confidentially.
The rest of the courses and audio and resources in the Sanctuary are virtual/pre-recorded. You can go at your own pace, tap in and out when you have energy (or are needing to receive a healing boost). Once you purchase, you’ll receive an email with your log in and you’ll have access to all current materials and all future updates, as long as you are a current member! And I have so much good stuff planned, and it will continue to be released in digital form that you can listen to/watch from your device, at your leisure.
If you do wish to have extra, live, 1-on-1 support from me you can upgrade to the THRIVE level (Bereavement Care Package) or the TRANSFORM level (Private Virtual Healing Retreat), but these are add-ons to the TFMR Support Sanctuary. The Sanctuary itself is currently mostly digital and watch/do-at-your-own-pace, besides the monthly drop-in Zoom meeting.
The rest of the courses and audio and resources in the Sanctuary are virtual/pre-recorded. You can go at your own pace, tap in and out when you have energy (or are needing to receive a healing boost). Once you purchase, you’ll receive an email with your log in and you’ll have access to all current materials and all future updates, as long as you are a current member! And I have so much good stuff planned, and it will continue to be released in digital form that you can listen to/watch from your device, at your leisure.
If you do wish to have extra, live, 1-on-1 support from me you can upgrade to the THRIVE level (Bereavement Care Package) or the TRANSFORM level (Private Virtual Healing Retreat), but these are add-ons to the TFMR Support Sanctuary. The Sanctuary itself is currently mostly digital and watch/do-at-your-own-pace, besides the monthly drop-in Zoom meeting.
Can I just have access to the community? I don’t know if I want all the materials.
The community portion of the Sanctuary is specifically for members of the entire healing space. If community access is calling to you, I would take advantage of the current lifetime pricing, which I do not plan to have available for long. If you join now, you’ll have the comfort of knowing you will always be a part of this particular TFMR community, and when you are ready you can use any of the courses/collections/modules.
I’m currently pregnant/TTC after my termination. Should I still join?
I would say yes. Always check with your medical provider before doing any meditations/movement or any practices that you have doubts about, but know that I’ve created all of the materials to be very gentle on purpose. Grief is hard enough, and the meditations, journaling and art are trauma-informed and nothing will ever be forced on you and I offer many alternatives even within tutorials and guided practices.
While TTC or pregnant again, you are in a very open, receiving state but also a very fertile place for healing. It is a naturally creative space you are cultivating and opening, and the Sanctuary can be a great supplement for this time in your fertility journey.
While TTC or pregnant again, you are in a very open, receiving state but also a very fertile place for healing. It is a naturally creative space you are cultivating and opening, and the Sanctuary can be a great supplement for this time in your fertility journey.
My TFMR pregnancy loss was years ago. Will this still help me?
Personally, my TFMR was years ago (3+ years now) and I still use all these tools myself. I even get so much out of being the facilitator of the TFMR Grief Circles that I run where we do meditations, journaling, art, etc. live. It’s all still so helpful, even years later, and I continue to uncover ideas and corners of my life where grief touches it. So I would say that if you’ve landed on this page, and are still curious about the layers of your own grief and want easy-to-follow prompts and videos to help you explore how the loss of your baby makes you feel, this is the place/course for you.