About Ascend
APPLY BEFORE Dec. 8th, 2024 to save your spot
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Next groups starting in December 2024 Wednesday circles at 7pm Eastern starting December 11th Thursday circles at Noon Eastern starting December 12th |
This grief circle is a safe place
for grieving parents after termination for medical reasons
After a termination of a wanted pregnancy for medical reasons, there is the real experience of being excluded from healing spaces. You may have been unwelcome even in your own faith tradition group - a place that could have afforded you the much needed community support that a "regular" stillbirth parent receives. You may even have been misunderstood in your secular communities and families of origin, or worse forced to keep it all a secret so as to not lose this support you desperately need. No matter anyone else's opinion on the matter, you deserve support during and after this type of baby loss.
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This sacred TFMR grief circle is run by me, Sabrina, The TFMR Pregnancy Loss Doula
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You deserve a place where your spirit and soul
can be taken care of, within the web of a group.
Lifting each other up. Holding each other up.
That's why I created:
Ascend - a 6-month virtual TFMR grief circle
Next groups starting December 2024
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$250 (6 monthly payments)
or
$1,400 (one time payment)
INTERESTED? APPLY TO ENROLL:
$250 (6 monthly payments)
or
$1,400 (one time payment)
INTERESTED? APPLY TO ENROLL:
Apply through the button above
Apply now to make sure you can join one of the small, intimate groups of no more than 6 people each
UPCOMING GROUP SCHEDULES:
Apply now to make sure you can join one of the small, intimate groups of no more than 6 people each
UPCOMING GROUP SCHEDULES:
LIVE grief circle support groups held 2x/month
starting
Dec. 11th Wednesday circles at 7pm Eastern
Dec. 12th Thursday circles at Noon Eastern/ 5pm London time
(Choose one group time and stay with the same cohort throughout the program)
starting
Dec. 11th Wednesday circles at 7pm Eastern
Dec. 12th Thursday circles at Noon Eastern/ 5pm London time
(Choose one group time and stay with the same cohort throughout the program)
“The healing power of even the most microscopic exchange with someone who knows in a flash precisely what you’re talking about because she experienced that thing too cannot be overestimated.”
-Cheryl Strayed
Ascend is the grief circle for you if:
❣You are feeling the deep pull to share your grief experience, your story and your baby's story in a safe place
❣You experienced a termination of a wanted pregnancy and are looking for a place to speak about and process the soul shattering changes it's brought about in your life
❣You are looking for a tight community experience, with other TFMR families
❣You wish to feel held and seen as the grieving parent you are, in a non-judgmental place
❣You are ready to do the grief work of integrating the loss and love that comes with this type of baby loss
This grief circle is open to:
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Note:
Partners of any gender are welcome as well, although there will be a lot of talk about the somatic experience of carrying the child in our wombs, the deaths that occurred in and through our bodies, and the implications for our minds, bodies and souls in the aftermath.
The Details:
Ascend: A Three Month TFMR Grief Circle
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Meeting dates and times -
We will meet approximately every 2 weeks for 6 months
For the next upcoming groups, meetings will be on
WEDNESDAYS at 4pm Pacific Time/ 7pm Eastern Time
THURSDAYS at Noon Eastern Time/ 5:00pm London Time
Meetings are 2 hours long each
This program includes:
💜 Twice monthly LIVE meeting circles (valued at $1000) These sacred circles will be held on Zoom. Due to the confidential nature of these circles, the circle will be live and unrecorded (although I can send you the basic exercises we do if you miss a part of or a whole session.) In this space, we will gather to look deeply at and hold each other through different subjects and aspects of the grief of this type of baby loss. |
💜A private Whatsapp group (valued at $100/month) Where we can meet and share at any time, day or night, as we go through the circle ceremonies together. I have some special surprises planned for the group which will include energy healing, tarot pulls and guided meditations. These gentle yet deep practices are great supplements alongside hard grief work. They can give a moment to rest and restore our exhausted bodies and minds. |
💜1-on-1 private support (valued at $199/month) You get written and/or voice messages with me, your pregnancy loss doula, during the course of the program. This kind of messenger support gives you another layer of support beyond the group. A private place to be heard and seen in your grief. And your 1-on-1 support starts as soon as you enroll. Enroll early and your extra 1-on-1 support starts now. |
The topics:
Each meeting will focus on one of the following themes
This whole program is valued at over $2000,
but I want to personally invite you today for just $1400 (one payment, or in 6 payments of $250)
Apply now and join the next groups starting in Dec. 2024
“Grief is like living two lives...One where you pretend everything is all right and the other is where your heart silently screams in pain."
-Unknown
Ja'Nai shares her experience in Ascend:
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"I felt parts of my heart that I thought were cold...I could feel them again.
(Ascend) is truly a place where you can find community.
I found ways that I could take steps forward."
-Ja'Nai, TFMR mom
Amanda shares about her time in Ascend
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"I was searching for a community where I could talk to people without feeling judged. A safe space where I didn't have to explain myself."
-Amanda, TFMR mom
What others are saying:"I AM a mother." “My biggest takeaway from being in Ascend is that what I am feeling is okay.
And even if that changes tomorrow, that is okay too. TFMR is the hardest "decision" a mother could ever make. And that I AM a mother. And nothing can change that." -Maria"Really excellent to have a dedicated and scheduled time to do grief work." “It has been incredibly helpful to be a part of a community and have carved out time to grieve. Before I joined I felt so much loneliness and isolation. I had difficulty knowing how/when to talk about the loss. Waves of grief that would last days and make it hard to work/socialize.
The live circles are the most helpful. It is really excellent to have a dedicated and scheduled time to do grief work, in community with others. The live circles often motivate me to do other work in between, as well, which has been helpful. It is also great to have Sabrina as a resource to access when a moment of grief or desire to process comes up. I have so much more validation of my grief and experience of trauma in losing my baby. Even though it was somewhat subconscious before, I realize now that I felt that enough time had passed for me to start feeling better and that my grief wasn't fully valid. I also think I was trying to avoid calling my experience traumatic because of recognition of other types of traumas people experience and feeling this was not big enough. Joining Ascend has helped me see my grief is valid and therefore given me space to feel it, engage with it and be more authentic with how I am doing and what I need. That has been invaluable. I’ve learned that we carry our grief and our loss with us along our journey of life, and that is okay.” -Maeve"Doing this work with OTHERS has been the most helpful part." “I am so glad that I joined the Ascend grief circle. I didn't realize how much I needed this space and how helpful it could be until joining. I feel so much less alone and less afraid of my grief.
I was struggling to identify, acknowledge and experience my grief but doing this work with others has been the most helpful part regardless of what we are doing. I don't think I would get the same benefit doing it one-on-one. I am so grateful that Sabrina has created this safe and beautiful group of women to work through our grief together. I have learned so much about myself from listening to the other group members; it is a truly special space. I like the mix of more guided/directed activities and the open sharing. I think it helps to open and close the circle with a more structured activity like a meditation, energy work or journaling and then have some time to process that together. I also really enjoyed the stories that Sabrina would share and then incorporate into an art or journaling prompt. I was really surprised by how many of my challenges, thoughts, feelings etc. were mirrored in others regardless of our unique circumstances. I did not expect so many similarities across the group members. I also thought 2 hours would feel really long, but I find it going very fast and not wanting the group to end. I am less afraid of my grief and don't feel I have to hide from it and hide it from others so much. I'm learning to identify and understand the different layers of grief and how they may manifest in my own life, body and mind. My biggest takeaway is that I'm not alone. “ -Heidi |
My TFMR and why I created this grief circle
Termination for medical reasons is not an uncommon type of pregnancy loss but feels so very uncommon since many people chose to keep the experience private, secret, locked behind closed doors.
It's an experience that is rarely, if ever, talked about.
When I went through my termination, after a diagnosis of hydrops (hydrops fetalis), cystic hygroma and other anomalies, I was the first person I'd ever known to go through with ending a wanted pregnancy. I knew a few friends who had had very early abortions of unwanted and unplanned pregnancies, but my experience felt so different. Not "better" or more "ethical" or any of that bullshit, just different.
We had planned and wanted this baby. We named her Clara.
It's an experience that is rarely, if ever, talked about.
When I went through my termination, after a diagnosis of hydrops (hydrops fetalis), cystic hygroma and other anomalies, I was the first person I'd ever known to go through with ending a wanted pregnancy. I knew a few friends who had had very early abortions of unwanted and unplanned pregnancies, but my experience felt so different. Not "better" or more "ethical" or any of that bullshit, just different.
We had planned and wanted this baby. We named her Clara.
After my termination, which I learned was referred to as a TFMR (termination for medical reasons)
I needed, so desperately, to be in a group of other people who had been through THIS, specifically.
Terminating a WANTED pregnancy, making a lifetime worth of medical decisions for a fragile child
or your own fragile health in a law-constricted "few days" worth of "decide now or your only option is to carry to term."
I did not feel safe going to a broad spectrum support group or "regular" loss mom retreat… I felt like I would have to check and double check that the leaders were ACTUALLY allies, that they would stop other members from looking me in the eye and saying, "I'd never…" Would they actually understand?
If this story sounds familiar, this space may be for you. Pre-vetted, safe for the grief of a TFMR parent. A place where you are understood.
A deeper healing experience than free support groups,
& more than a grief circle
This is so much more than a free support group (which I definitely recommend you join as well, I even run my own for our community) Ascend is a special sacred container for us to go deep into our shared experience of losing a child this way.
This grief circle is actually even more than a grief circle. It will be a ceremony, a ritual space (yes, it can be done virtually!), a sacred temporary coven.
This grief circle is actually even more than a grief circle. It will be a ceremony, a ritual space (yes, it can be done virtually!), a sacred temporary coven.
We will look through the lens of myth, ritual, universal spirituality, what it means to mother, to parent, to hold life and death in our very bodies and wombs, to be the keepers and deciders of life.
We come together because we know what it's like to fiercely parent our children, and give them peace. We come together because we have had to fiercely care for ourselves and our bodies as well.
We come together because we deserve to bravely parent ourselves, and seek peace for ourselves as well.
FAQ
How LonG IS Each Circle/Support group session?
Each circle is 2 hours long, so you can look at your schedule to see if it would fit in.
HOW LONG IS THE PROGRAM?
This grief circle program runs for 6 months of support, with live circles every two weeks.
How many people are in each circle/group?
I cap each group at 6 people, to keep the space intimate and warm. Each circle has the same 4 or 5 or 6 people going through the program together, so we get to know each other and create trust.
I'M already in THERAPy. IS THIS Group therapy?
That is so wonderful that you have found a therapist that is working for you. That is a GIGANTIC win. And to answer your question, this grief circle is *not* psychotherapy, and it is *not* group therapy.
I am a Pregnancy Loss Doula, and I'm here to create a sacred space for us to meet as bereaved TFMR parents. This is a circle, a meeting space, a place to be together in community. It's a combination of peer support and doula emotional and spiritual support.
I am a Pregnancy Loss Doula, and I'm here to create a sacred space for us to meet as bereaved TFMR parents. This is a circle, a meeting space, a place to be together in community. It's a combination of peer support and doula emotional and spiritual support.
My TFMR pregnancy Loss was Very Recent/many years ago. Should I still apply?
Yes, please apply! For those very freshly out, being in a safe community can be a lot but the healing and understanding you'll find is unparalled. Wherever you are in grief, you are welcome. We got you <3. You also get 1:1 text support from me as your bereavement doula if something just feels a little too raw to share inside the group.
And if you are farther out, know there is no expiration date on grief. And you may find yourself in need of help because another recent loss is bringing up your grief for your baby. Or maybe you are coming up on a hard milestone or grief "anniversary." Or perhaps you were never allowed to grieve due to family or your culturaI environment. I want you to know, I am here for you.
Whether you are recently bereaved are farther out, apply and we'll chat more to see if this group grief circle would be a good fit.
And if you are farther out, know there is no expiration date on grief. And you may find yourself in need of help because another recent loss is bringing up your grief for your baby. Or maybe you are coming up on a hard milestone or grief "anniversary." Or perhaps you were never allowed to grieve due to family or your culturaI environment. I want you to know, I am here for you.
Whether you are recently bereaved are farther out, apply and we'll chat more to see if this group grief circle would be a good fit.
I AM VERY MUCH AN INTROVERT. WILL I BE PUT ON THE SPOT AND FORCED TO SPEAK?
A resounding NO, I will never put you on the spot. You can share or not share, speak out or listen and be the sacred witness if you feel called to. I will also carefully watch the time and space and not allow it to be all about the more outgoing members.
And this program comes with 1-on-1 access to me as your Pregnancy Loss Doula, so you can always send me your messages and questions privately. You can wait to speak up on a topic in our private space, which we will share over a texting and audio/voice messaging app called Whatsapp.
And this program comes with 1-on-1 access to me as your Pregnancy Loss Doula, so you can always send me your messages and questions privately. You can wait to speak up on a topic in our private space, which we will share over a texting and audio/voice messaging app called Whatsapp.
I'M CURRENTLY PREGNANT OR ACTIVELY TTC. CAN I STILL JOIN?
This is a really great question, and I would say YES, in a pregnancy after loss or while trying to conceive, working through blocks and fears and learning how to be with our grief is so important.
This is a gentle space, although we acknowledge the darkness and difficulties of grieving, just knowing you have a group and a community you can fall back on for emotional and spiritual support is priceless. Especially while navigating your fertility journey.
If you become pregnant during the program, you may find that this group is the only place you are ready to open up to about your early pregnancy. And that is a gift.
Meet your Loss Doula,
Ritual Keeper and High Priestess |
A little more about me:
Hi, I'm Sabrina Fletcher, Loss Doula. Ever since I went through my own termination, alone, my husband relegated to the waiting area, I've been drawn to help people going through the TFMR experience. One way I can help is by being your Pregnancy Loss Doula. But with Covid, there is not much in-person hand holding during procedures allowed, and most people find me after they have gone through with their terminations. The postpartum period and beyond is when we still need much care and help. With or without a baby on this plane, we are still postpartum parents. It is still a rite of passage that deserves to be marked and celebrated and honored. As a loss doula, I combine my skills as a Reiki teacher, intuitive healer, tarot reader, contemplative educator and training as a baby loss family advisor into a holistic bundle of emotional and spiritual care. For you, the grieving mumma, the grieving papa. |
What others are saying about working with me:
Before I joined Ascend I was feeling isolated, even though I joined other online TFMR support groups.
Now I feel like I have something to look forward to, even though it's not the situation I had hoped for, I never imagined support throughout the years, and finally, here it is.
-Ja'Nai
Sabrina's work has been immensely helpful in navigating my grief. I read her posts, watch her videos and attend her live sessions.
Her compassionate, gentle and professional nature makes her the perfect TFMR doula.
Her recent live session not only provided me with much needed emotional support but also gave me a spiritual uplifting.
My son, my loss and my grief were acknowledged and validated by Sabrina. After the session I felt calmer and more at peace with my decision to TFMR. I am looking forward to everything that Sabrina does to help me navigate life without my baby.
Her compassionate, gentle and professional nature makes her the perfect TFMR doula.
Her recent live session not only provided me with much needed emotional support but also gave me a spiritual uplifting.
My son, my loss and my grief were acknowledged and validated by Sabrina. After the session I felt calmer and more at peace with my decision to TFMR. I am looking forward to everything that Sabrina does to help me navigate life without my baby.
-Pat
Sabrina's sessions and work have really helped me in that she is so good at creating and holding space for all aspects of the TFMR experience.
From personal experience, it is often very difficult to do that for ourselves and I have found it so necessary to have that help in order to tackle some of my bigger hurdles in grief and processing my loss. I really appreciate that Sabrina does this work and helps us along our own path in healing.
From personal experience, it is often very difficult to do that for ourselves and I have found it so necessary to have that help in order to tackle some of my bigger hurdles in grief and processing my loss. I really appreciate that Sabrina does this work and helps us along our own path in healing.
-Meggi
Ready to join us? We start again soon!
Limited spots (only 6 per group) available to keep the circle intimate and warm
One payment of $1400
or 6 monthly payments of $250
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Join the circle now and your 1-on-1 support begins TODAY
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Applications closing Dec. 8th, 2024