"...and then the doctor furrowed his brow, and went very silent..."

​And then our Maternal Fetal Medicine doctor got very very silent during a scan. The scan that changed our life.

Oof, that moment will stay with me forever.

That silence. If you know, you know.

We are connected in this silence. This heartwrenching silence. That space before the poor prenatal diagnosis, the "I'm sorry, there's something wrong with your baby."

And then your world is changed forever.

...

I was talking to my husband about how ubiquitous that silence is, how many of us know that "look on their face" before the bad news… how it's so similar across our loss stories and he said, "Really?"

And I said, "Really."

And my husband replied, "It's a moment that I'll never forget...when I saw the doctor's face and knew, uh oh, something is really wrong."

My daughter would almost be two now. If that wouldn't have happened. If she would have been healthy. If. 

Thinking of all of you, and all your babies. Your very special would-have-beens 💗💗💗

P.S. This is a quote from my memoir on my TFMR and my spiritual journey after loss. If you have any connections in the publication world, I'm looking to get it published. Any help appreciated.

And if you have published part or all of your story, share the link here below. Reading other TFMR stories is so helpful in grief. We learn we are not alone.